Frances has the warmest smile, she’s full of life and enthusiasm, and at 17, has a wisdom and life perspective far beyond her years. “If you sit and dwell on what you don’t have, you’ll miss out on the blessings you do have”, says Frances.
At the age of 4, she immigrated to Canada from Sierra Leone, with her mom and older brother, leaving her father behind. Her parents were born in Liberia, but sought refuge in Sierra Leone during the devastating civil war in Liberia.
Life was challenging for the family. Her mom worked two jobs to support them. Her weekdays were a mundane routine of school and child care and she was usually in bed by the time her mom returned home from work each night.
But on the weekend, when she attended CityKidz, life felt different. “At CityKidz, you get to be a kid and experience a childhood that you didn’t get on the weekdays,” says Frances. The lessons and the mentors taught her how to be a
better version of herself and appreciate the little things. She learned that the challenges she was facing in life, could actually make her stronger.
But at the age of twelve when Frances joined the CityYouth program, her outlook on life was changing. “I had a lot of rage and anger in me at that
time. I had become aware of how much different and harder my life was than my peers.” She felt envious of her friend’s relationships with their fathers. Her father has missed most of her life and all the big moments. And, she felt
ostracized from her peers. “I remember teachers asking what we did over the
summer and feeling really angry after hearing about my friends’ vacations and summer fun and feeling like I missed out. My mom just didn’t have the money for these things.”
Frances felt like she didn’t fit in anywhere. Her friends couldn’t empathize with her. Her mom didn’t understand what it was like to grow up in Canada. And she felt her teacher’s didn’t understand her either. This loneliness, anger and resentment led to Frances acting out, withdrawing, her grades slipping and a loss of interest in the things she once cared about.
And then, her maternal grandmother, who lived in Sierra Leone, passed away
while visiting her native country of Liberia. Not getting the chance to see her or say goodbye was heartbreaking. She came to the conclusion that the world can only hurt her.
In 2019, Frances left CityYouth and shortly after, the pandemic arrived. With a lot of free time, she began to reflect on life. She pondered the cultural contrasts
between her life and her mother’s.
Recognizing her parents’ struggles, Frances embraced her dual culture and
she began to let go of some of her anger. She also realized how much impact her CityYouth mentors had on her.
Susan, who had been a mentor in France’s life from the age of 4, always listened and made her feel safe. “Susan is there to help if I fall. She’s a constant source of encouragement and voice of reason in my head. I need her in my life”, says Frances.
She made her way back to CityYouth. Here, she was reminded that there are people in this world who do care about you and see you. “I felt like I was
screaming all these years and finally someone actually listened to me.”
She found the support of mentors who saw her and spoke into her life. There was a different bond than she’d experienced elsewhere in her world and a closeness. Her spirit changed from anger and disillusionment to hope, compassion and deep gratitude.
Through CityKidz, Frances was also able to attend summer camps. Here, she forged friendships and partook in activities she once believed were beyond her reach, mirroring those enjoyed by her peers. Feeling the connection with the camp councillors and the way they made her feel important and seen, she dreamed of becoming a camp councillor one day.
Last summer, that dream came true for Frances. She was hired on as part of our Camp CityKidz team. As we wrapped up our season, she gushed about how grateful she was for the opportunity. “Kids remind you of everything there
is to look forward to in the world. They make you forget the challenges you’re
dealing with and give you an opportunity to see yourself in a new light”, she says.
Next year, Frances plans to study political science in university. Her dream is to help bring positive change to Sierra Leone’s governance through work with the UN or other channels. Her going concern is finding grants and scholarships to help support her education.
This past February Frances was an award recipient of the John C. Holland Awards, celebrating excellence in Hamilton’s Black Community. The awards recognize academic achievements and provide scholarships and support for post-secondary education. Way to go, Frances!